Can't stop watching...

Children are our future

I really have no words for this. A teenager allegedly stowed away in the wheel well of a plane, fell out, and died. How did he even get in there?? This is a tragic story but I can't help but be troubled that someone slipped inside of a plane unnoticed, despite how intense our security apparently is.

MILTON, Mass. -- Authorities are investigating the possibility that a 16-year-old boy found dead in Milton fell from a plane on approach to Logan Airport.

The body of Delvonte Tisdale was discovered mangled on a Milton road on Nov. 9. He was only wearing jeans.

Logan International Airport spokesman Phil Orlandella said Tuesday investigators are looking into the possibility that Tisdale may have been in the airplane's wheel well and fell out. He would not elaborate.

Via WHDH.

WTF TSA

I believe I've already mentioned how amused I am by the recent TSA backlash. This video tells the tale of how easy it is to (accidentally) sneak some things from the no-fly list onto your flight. I may or may not have managed to get some of my own contraband on a plane -- post 9/11 -- and it was alarmingly simple. Don't we all feel safe in the warm arms of those $14/hr part-timers now?



*You might want to forward a minute to get past all the applause.

Via the Consumerist.

THE Ben Bernanke

When I was a senior in college my favorite phrase was "I should have majored in _____!" One of the more common blank-fillers was economics. Another thing I should have majored in is having a computer recite text and use it as a voiceover on cute cartoons. I love these videos because the robot voice makes them seem so cynical and apathetic, two of my favorite qualities.



Via the Consumerist.

Camping with hipsters

I am always amused by these videos. I kind of hate the Geico ripoffs, though. Anyway. Coachella is one of those things that I always say I need to do, but when it comes down to it, no one I know wants to spend $300-400 to be surrounded by dirty hipsters for three days in the desert, despite how epic the lineup will be.

Pretty Gross

This one is for my younger brother, who is a jeweler's apprentice or something.

I put myself through University working at a well-known fine jewelry store in Canada. Some women will tell you, even though they are single, exactly what their engagement ring will look like. What metal, how large the stone, what cut, color and clarity. It is all perfect in their minds. I am not one of those women; I knew nothing of diamonds or any other stone. It was a fluke when I got the job, so I had a lot to learn when I started. Facts about metallurgy, gemology and, regretfully, personal hygiene. I worked hard; I taught myself everything I could about the business. I learned, I experienced, I sold and I nearly puked.

The grotesque things that people brought in every day reached freak-show levels. I have seen hair clogs in earrings before. I have also seen earrings encrusted, as though coral were growing over a ship wreck, with dirt, soap residue and pus.

Sounds yummy! Thanks goes to Jezebel.

Two Times

My favorite news story lately is all the TSA drama. They are really a silly bunch. I am one of the billion people flying over Thanksgiving so I am currently facing the age-old debate, a healthy dose of radiation or going to second base with a stranger? Here are two fun stories about the new TSA regulations.

Most people hate babies on flights. Americans hate them because they're terrorists.

It's embarrassing and totally politically incorrect, but you have to admit you've done it. You're seated on a flight, start looking around, and your gaze stops at the 3-year-olds you come across, wondering whether or not they're potential hijackers. But fear not, concerned travelers. The Transportation Security Administration has got your back, demonstrating it's fully capable of giving pre-schoolers vigorous pat-downs to ensure they're not packing any WMDs underneath their pull-ups.

This is from the Consumerist. They are fantastic.

One tactic is apparently to expose, rather than to grope.

Listen, we know the TSA's been unpopular lately. But are they really so bad? What about this time a TSA screener pulled down a woman's blouse while frisking her? And then laughed about it? Yes. Yes, they are that bad.

From Gizmodo. Also fantastic.

Command + F5?

It has recently occured to me that I spend my days opening tab after tab of entertainment to share with friends, but these get all get lost in the series of tubes we all lovingly refer to as the Internet. I think it may be a good idea to start accumulating these fun things here. I'm not a hipster so I couldn't go to Tumblr. I'm not fancy so I couldn't go to WordPress. But I have feelings for Google that I've never felt for a human before so to Blogger I go!

To kick things off here is a story from MSN that got stranger and stranger with every sentence.

A woman posed as a physician and duped at least two other women into undergoing breast exams at her hands in Boise-area nightclubs, according to police.

Kristina Ross, 37, remains in the Ada County Jail on two felony counts of practicing medicine without a license. An Idaho judge set bond at $100,000 on Wednesday.

Police said Ross introduced herself to victims — one at a downtown Boise bar and the other at a nightclub in a Boise suburb — as a plastic surgeon named Berlyn Aussieahshowna, a name that turned out to be bogus.

Spoiler alert, this fake lady doctor used to be a dude. Finish the story here